And now for our keynote speaker: master P

I’ve been trying to follow the path of righteousness lately. I’ve been staying away from pork, temptations of the flesh, and that old heathen devil brew known as the mojito. And I’ve been trying…I say I’ve been trying to keep my personal level of profanity down to its absolute minimum. Then I hear that the NAACP replaced Bill Clinton with master P as a the keynote youth speaker this year. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU BACKWARDS BULLSHIT NEGROES!? I swear on my moms I’m about drive over to Justin Timberlake’s house and give him my black card. I’ll be like “Dude, since everybody else seems to want to give you a ghetto pass, let me officially donate my Black card to you. Take it, you want to be black so bad. I’m sick of these Negroes!”
I’m not against Master P. I actually think the man is a brilliant marketing entrepreneur. But is he the one the youth need to hear from? With all the shit that’s going on for black people these days you pick a former rapper turned dancing under the stars man as your go to guy? What Malcolm Gladwell was too busy? Obama said No? Don Cheadle was off shooting another movie? Master Fucking P? No wonder enrollment numbers for the National association for the advancement of CERTAIN people is so low. Fuck it, next time ya’ll se me, don’t be surprised if I’m speaking Hindi trying to pass myself off as the only dark skinned bollywood star.